Recently I took a picture of my coffee and some other “staged” items and was planning to caption it-“But First, Coffee!”  When all of a sudden I had an aha moment-this is a load of BS.  haha, I mean, before I even had time to think let alone drink my coffee that morning I woke up to both kids needing to have diapers changed(Emme) and or go to the bathroom(Max), get dressed, eat breakfast, load up their snacks for workout class, I mean, you get my point here.  Basically, this caption just does not work for moms!  At any rate, it had me thinking about all of the other things we “don’t” get to do or things that simply have changed.

{The above photo is one of the many outakes I took of my coffee that day to only end up realizing they all stunk anyways!!!  lol}

Here are a few examples of how this chapter of life, we just can’t always go with the “plan” or what we “want.”

 I recently joined a new gym. Boy was I excited. Our “plan” was to sign the kids up for the child care and I could go every morning if I wanted and even shower there 😳. Well, we never signed them up for the child care because they both have been sick so much we didn’t think it was fair to bring them around other kids and didn’t want them more sick than they have already been. This winter has been brutal!!  We signed up in January and our “plan” changed. Come mid April and Back to my old workout routine I go! Which to be honest, I really missed. It’s this amazing village of women and kids with like minded fitness goals, fun activities for the kids, and great convo! Read all about it here.

{This is me after our workout class with both kids, just happy the sun is shining!}

Shop this entire look here including my $14 sunnies!!!

Another example, We were gifted Chicago Cubs tickets for Christmas(their second home game). The weather finally turned into spring and it was such a beautiful day…….Emme got sick(actually our babysitter too). We didn’t go. I really am growing up because I wasn’t even upset about the game, just that it was an absolutely gorgeous day and we hadn’t had one in awhile.

Fridays…omg I used to LIVE for Friday’s. Still do actually. It’s just a LOT different. Now, I get excited because Dusko will get home and my duties will have lessened. And if we’re lucky, we get to go out for pizza!

This is about what our fridays look like right now and that is just fine!

Long trips to target(or any store for that matter)….ALONE….I used to loathe going grocery shopping or anything. I’m not afraid to be alone but just Love having someone to chat with. On a lucky occasion I get to go alone now and I really enjoy it, I know we all do!

Getting ready every day? Forget about it!

Truly, my point here is, some day, we will likely get to say……But First, COFFEE!  And really mean it again.  This chapter is going to come and go before our very eyes and more than anything we will wish these Big kids were little again.  So I am going to try my best to cherish every second that I don’t get to drink a warm coffee or my iced coffee is watered down because I have added ice to it 3 different times.  This is a reminder to myself that even though the days are long, the years are way too damn short.

Moms feel guilt for different reasons, some feel guilt financially because let’s be honest, kids are expensive!  So maybe that pedicure isn’t worth the $45 anymore.  Some feel guilt because they have to go to work everyday, and some feel guilt because they do get to stay home with them but not every minute of everyday is sunshine and rainbows.  Some mom’s feel guilt for taking care of themselves-I mean seriously, they can stay in their crib 10 mins longer so we can get a shower in!

I recently felt MOM guilt hard.  Dusko & I went on a weekend getaway to Arizona & California.  The morning we were leaving Maxwell woke up with a 102 fever.  He was crying and did NOT want us to leave.  I felt guilt, a lot of guilt.  But some of the guilt I felt was because I WANTED to make sure we got on that airplane.  I needed the break!  But I also knew deep down that he was probably going to be sick the entire time.  I also knew that Emerson was probably going to get sick, sooner rather than later.  Well, we got on the plane.  Max got better in a day and Emme got sick the next day.  Basically they were sick the entirety of our trip.  It sucked and all I wanted was to be here holding my babies when they needed me most.  In all reality, they were with their two grandmas and who better than to spoil them when mom isn’t there???  Plus, I came home(as a sahm) appreciating them A LOT more!  And guess what, they are just fine.  My point-take the trip!!  They won’t remember you leaving them and honestly by next month you will forget too.  Although, I do remember when I was in 3rd(ish) grade, my mom and grandma dragging me to some IHSA State golf tournament for my uncle when I had the stomach flu.  I still joke to this day that it was horrible!  lol.  I wonder if my mom felt guilt that day🤣🤣🤣. Sometimes it’s just hard to be in two places at once.

The cold, hard, reality is that our children are going to be much happier people the happier we are with ourselves!  SO get out there and do something for yourself today that you might have felt guilty about yesterday!!!!  What are you going to take the time to do?  Would love to hear in the comments!